Tales From the Lockdown Dystopia

As new lockdowns in the UK are being instituted and Christmas promises are being broken, protests are being held in London and beyond. The year is being topped off with more restrictions, more intrusions, more fear, and more capitulation. Amid the largest man-made catastrophe in decades, whole populations shiver in terror, paralyzed. Some of them become accomplices to the crime, enforcers of this new order.

A year ago, such a situation was unimaginable for most. Only a few voices could have been listened to as they kept warning us that this would be our future. After all hell had broken loose, more people started to recognize that we had always been on this path. The slide of previously liberal societies into totalitarianism was slow but steady. At a certain point when the watershed moment is reached, all it takes is a spark. If it hadn’t been the virus, it would have been something else, sooner or later.

A year ago, we were worried about how Brexit is going to turn out. Raising awareness of climate change was often the issue of the day. Trump announced a deal with Turkey to withdraw troops from Syria and announced a Space Force. Protests had been intensifying in Hong Kong against the proposed extradition bill. 

In late March, nothing like that was important anymore. A spectre was haunting the world - the spectre of totalitarianism.

It all went quick. China cracked down. No one cared. That is what you would expect from the CCP, after all, isn’t it? Italy cracked down. Good. At least they will deal with it over there. Too late. This virus is a punishment for your sins. We must repent. We must act responsibly. This is what your disobedience leads to. If you hadn’t been so selfish, we all wouldn’t have to suffer now. Be honest with me now, are you surprised this is happening after not having followed the commands of your betters?

Now you need to do what you’re told. Corona is The Great Equalizer. No one is spared. Anyone could drop dead at any point. We cannot afford to allow individuals to make decisions for themselves anymore. This is bigger than them. We all have a responsibility to each other. Now that you are equal with everyone, what’s the point of protesting? We all have the same goal here. We all want this to go away.

Fifteen days to flatten the curve. We have to do this, we have no other choice. This is horrible for everyone. This is obviously temporary and your fears are unfounded. No one wants this to go on; everyone is suffering.

Look at Taiwan. Look at South Korea. They did not have to lock down. This is because they listened to the experts. Asian culture is more communitarian - people care about others more. They are able to recognize that their personal interests are not above the common good. I can see that you don’t care, though. If people cooperated with contact tracers, they wouldn’t need to be locked in their homes. This is your fault. You took one more walk outside today than what you were allowed. Well, if people behave like this, no wonder we’re in this mess. There is nothing we are able to do if you resist. As soon as you submit, you will be able to go back to normal.

Stay Alert; Control the Virus; Save Lives. Stay home; Protect the NHS; Save Lives. Shouldn’t the NHS protect me? How can you even say that! Health workers are heroes. I didn’t see you clapping on Thursday... I can’t believe you can be so arrogant. Put up a rainbow in your window to show solidarity!

We are sorry to say that your business has been deemed non-essential. This is not personal. We all have to make sacrifices. Do your part. Get some wine and stay home. We’ll get through this together. Here is some money we just printed. What? Yes, we were able to do this all along. There are some grave consequences to this, but as you will undoubtedly admit, this is an exceptional situation. Stop complaining about the money, your shop has closed down, after all. Nothing was done to you. This is the new normal. Your businesses failed, faced with the new realities of the virus.

We do not recommend mask mandates, as there is little evidence they work. We recommend mask mandates, as overwhelming evidence shows they work. We should listen to the WHO, they are the experts, after all. It is literally the World Health Organization - what better experts do you want? It is no wonder you were banned from YouTube. If you had any sense, you wouldn’t be posting this stuff. Lives are at stake here and you are a dangerous influence on the public.

When entering a restaurant, make sure to have your mask on. Only take it off when you’re seated. You can have a beer, but only with a substantial meal. A scotch egg clearly isn’t a substantial meal. Sorry, scotch egg on a proper plate is a substantial meal. This is getting awkward. You know what? You actually can’t sell alcohol at all. Did you hear that guy in California suggesting that people put on their masks between bites? What a moron, that’s clearly ridiculous. When you’re on a train and you have a cup of coffee with you, remember to put on your mask when you’re not drinking.

We developed a three-tier system. If the spread gets worse somewhere, that county or locality will go to a higher tier. The three-tier system is not enough. We need a four-week circuit-breaker lockdown and then go back to the three-tier system. We’ve kept our promise, see? You’re complaining now about being in a higher tier than before the lockdown, but it was the lockdown you didn’t want… would you make up your mind? Three tiers are not enough. Tier 4 is what we need to fight against the new strain of the virus. It’s not lockdown, it’s the fourth tier of the three-tier system; stop playing stupid.

Thankfully, it seems that the vaccine will work against the new strain. Once enough people are vaccinated, life will go back to normal. We will be able to reopen our economies and allow you to have things in your life to look forward to. There will have to be common-sense restrictions, of course, to make sure everyone is safe. In the post-corona world, we need to make sure this does not happen again. This was your punishment for too much individualism, remember? There will. be. no. disobedience in the future, unless you want to go through this again. We wouldn’t want that, but it’s up to you.

Freedom? Don’t be silly. Be reasonable. We live in the twenty-first century. We live in a society.

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This is the strange world we find ourselves in. It will not last forever. Every totalitarianism eventually comes to an end. The lesson we learn from all of this has to be remembered, though. Governments were either powerless to avoid this, were unwilling to do so, or have done this on purpose. In either case, they are unfit for purpose.